In order to perform any actions besides unpacking files at install/remove time you will need to make use of package maintainer scripts
(Note, "pinging home" is often seen as somewhat dubious practice by software if done without the consent of the user, though seeing as this is an in-house package, I guess that's not really an issue).
A rough example would be using a packagename.postinst something like this:
#!/bin/sh
# postinst script for #PACKAGE#
#
# see: dh_installdeb(1)
set -e
# summary of how this script can be called:
# * <postinst> `configure' <most-recently-configured-version>
# * <old-postinst> `abort-upgrade' <new version>
# * <conflictor's-postinst> `abort-remove' `in-favour' <package>
# <new-version>
# * <postinst> `abort-remove'
# * <deconfigured's-postinst> `abort-deconfigure' `in-favour'
# <failed-install-package> <version> `removing'
# <conflicting-package> <version>
# for details, see http://www.debian.org/doc/debian-policy/ or
# the debian-policy package
case "$1" in
configure)
ping server.net # ADD ACTIONS HERE
echo foo > /tmp/foo # ETC.
;;
abort-upgrade|abort-remove|abort-deconfigure)
;;
*)
echo "postinst called with unknown argument \`$1'" >&2
exit 1
;;
esac
# dh_installdeb will replace this with shell code automatically
# generated by other debhelper scripts.
#DEBHELPER#
exit 0
Obviously you'd need a corresponding removal in the pre/postrm scripts if you added any permanent files in the pre/postinstall scripts.
Templates for preinst, postinst, prerm and postrm scripts are available via the dh-make package, in the files
/usr/share/debhelper/dh_make/debian/*.ex